Be a Good Mom - Take Time to Relax

As moms, we are always on the go. We hit the ground running - fix the kids’ breakfast, get them dressed, throw in a load of laundry, play with Legos, change a diaper, unload the dishwasher, read them a book, answer the phone, switch the laundry… and this is all before noon! It’s exhausting just to think about it.

Since we are just coming out of the weekend, I thought I’d write about relaxing. I think that relaxing is highly underrated. Yes, it’s good and admirable to be efficient, industrious, and on top of things. Stuff needs to get done, and we’re the ones who take care of it. Having kids means staying busy, and it’s just part of the deal. Sometimes things flow smoothly, while other times it’s complete chaos. Let’s just remember that even though things need to be done, the most important things in life go way beyond the ringing phone and the buzzing dryer. Here are some things to remember:

• You are a mom – not a maid. Take the time to play with your kids. If you “should” be doing the dishes or you “should” be vacuuming, consider putting it off until after you play for a little while. That stuff can wait. If you are a stay-at-home-mom, just remember that you are home to be with your children, not to create the perfect house.
• Before long, your kids won’t think it’s cool to play with you. They’ll want you to drop them off a block away from the mall so no one sees your minivan. Enjoy playing dress up, and act like a kid yourself. They’re only little once.
• Take time for YOU. Not just for you and the family, not just for you and the kids, but alone time for yourself. Moms get into a rut when the only people they socialize are little kids. Sure, you see folks at play dates, but that’s also revolving around the kids. Get out by yourself, go buy new underwear, walk around the mall and window shop, or read a book in your favorite coffee house (and sit at a tiny table, one you’d never sit at when the kids were with you!). Trust me – it’s important to feel like yourself again.
• You will never get this day back. I know this sounds ominous, but I’m being serious. Each day is a gift, so enjoy the little moments.
• Don’t invent unnecessary stuff to do. This may sound silly, but I think a lot of us do that. Ask yourself, “Do I really NEED to clean up before this play date?” There are a lot of things we do because we are worried about what other people think. Don’t let that motivate you. Set your own standards, and that includes valuing yourself enough to set aside time that is just for you.
• Take care of the mother of your children. If you fall apart, that’s no good. Being obsessed with an immaculate house, participating in every activity available, or striving for perfection is not doing anyone any good. Go easy on yourself. Build in time for a pajama day with the kids, a family movie night, and a Saturday lunch with your girlfriends. Teach your children the lesson that it’s important to take care of ourselves, and that means recharging our batteries when we need to.

Just remember that life is about so much more than today. Invest in your children, invest in your relationships, and take care of yourself. Take the time to relax, to smell the aroma of the coffee as it’s brewing, and to watch in wonder as your child plays. Life flies by fast enough – so slow down and enjoy it.